Hurry Up & Wait

I've noticed that I sigh a lot lately. It’s an obscene amount of sighing. I try to keep my sighing internally, but they are becoming more and more vocal ...and heavier.

Fertility treatment is a giant waiting game. I'm currently waiting (err, anxiously waiting) for Aunt Flo to arrive. No one is ever excited for her arrival - unless you're waiting to finally begin treatment. Being off the pill for the past several years has made my cycle a little unpredictable. Some cycles are 22 days; other 27 days. It's always off just long enough for my mind to start wandering. Could this be THE month? Did we finally get it right?? A few pregnancy tests later and I’m left with yet another heartbreak. You’d think I’d get used to it by now. Or maybe at least stop taking a preggers test. But I continue to let just a bit of hope sneak in, only to be crushed moments later. :heavy sighs:

So here we are again. Waiting. Waiting for Aunt Flo to make her (hopefully last) appearance. The past few days have seen ALL the emotions and ALL the sighs. I’ve gone from moments of “holy crap this is IT!” to moments of pure doubt: “this’ll never work”. :more heavy sighing:

I’m super anxious. I’m definitely terrified. I’m a smidge excited. Currently, I’m annoyed with the waiting...