Sh*t just got real
Holy crap. Things just got real. Like, really real. Since Aunt Flo showed up over the weekend, I had to wait until Monday to hear back from Dr. Huber’s office. All my markers need to be taken on Day 3 of my cycle, so when Nurse Wendi (Look at me, learning everyone’s names!) finally called me back, she needed me to come in ASAP. Crap. Ok. On my way! I needed to get blood work and ultrasounds done AND a coaching session on how to use the injectable medication. Eek! Everything seemed pretty straight forward. I was given a calendar of when to take what meds and when to come back to the office. I headed home to put the injectables in the fridge, where I proceeded to have a complete emotional breakdown in the middle of the kitchen.
There I was: standing in front of an open fridge, a few boxes of meds in one hand, paperwork in the other, crying my eyes out. Honestly, I wasn’t even sure why I was crying. Everything happened so quickly. It had been maybe 90minutes from the time Nurse Wendi called to have me come in until the time I was in my kitchen. THIS WAS IT! This was what we have been waiting for, yet, suddenly, I’m absolutely terrified – I’m talking paralyzing fear. My mind is going in a thousand directly directions. My hands were shaking & sweaty. Tears are streaming down my flushed cheeks and I’m pretty sure I’m either going to throw up or pass out. Maybe both. Thank goodness Kirk was home. He wrapped his arms around me and tried to calm me down. He even joked that he didn’t think my paperwork needed to be refrigerated, but if it made me feel better, we could leave it in there. Oh my gracious! Ha. Ok, ok, ok. We got this. We’ve been waiting for this day for years. HERE. WE. GOOOOOOOO.
My treatment was 7 days of medication, beginning on Day 3 of my cycle: 5 days of an oral medication, Letrozole; followed by 2 days of an injectable, Follistim. I fully anticipated the same adverse reaction to these meds as I had with Clomid way back when. Although, for the first few days, it was hard to determine which were period symptoms and which were side effects from the drugs. Oof.
Day 3: Kitchen meltdown & 5mg Letrozole at bedtime.
Day 4: A bit restless, a little irritable, so many hot flashes, & 5mg Letrozole at bedtime.
Day 5: Still restless, a few hot flashes, & 5mg Letrozole at bedtime.
Day 6: Sleep? What’s that? Restless. Bouts of sadness. A mild headache. 5mg Letrozole at bedtime.
Day 7: Still restless. Awesome. Some random hot flashes. Fantastic. 5mg Letrozole at bedtime.
Day 8: A few lingering hot flashes here & there. 75 IU Follistim in the evening. Followed by another emotional breakdown and grogginess. Oh, and a pinching sensation at the injection site. A severe pinching sensation. Today’s win: I was able to give myself the shot.
Day 9: 75 IU Follistim in the evening & more pinching sensations. Today’s fail: I panicked with the shot & had to call in reinforcements. Good thing he’s cute.
Day 10: Back to Dr. Huber’s office for more bloodwork and ultrasounds. Everything looks good. Next step: IUI!
Whew. What a whirlwind of a week! It was the epitome of “hurry up & wait”. It was filled with lots of big emotions – some even too big to handle on my own. One of the greatest silver linings of creating this blog & (finally) being open about our journey is realizing just how deep the love our tribe has for us. Bringing up this topic is still hard for me, and probably always will be. I still have doubts that anyone wants to hear about our struggles. My people checked in with me a LOT this week. It was just what I needed. A gentle reminder that we’ve got some incredible support out there. And I can never thank y’all enough for that.
I am really glad that Kirk was with me for both Follistim shots. For your enjoyment, head to the Gallery to check out the videos I took of my shots. Be sure your sound is up. Kirk's commentary is GOLD.
